Tuesday, 5 June 2012

The Hope Seat {Short Tale Tuesday}



The timber seat under the tree was empty, just as she'd hoped it would be. She quickly wiped off the slight dew that had settled on it, and wiping her hand on her jeans, she sat and looked around her. The wet grass was glistening in the morning sunlight, and the trees stood mostly still, except for the slight fluttering of the leaves. The walking track was empty for the moment, but she knew that it wouldn't be long before there was a constant stream of walkers, runners, and other people out enjoying the cool autumn sunshine.

She drew her jacket around herself, as the early chill was still on the air. The steam from her breath made swirls, and it reminded her of the smoke rings she used to try and make when she was a much younger girl.
The breeze rustled the leaves of the tree above her, and blew a hair across her face, which tickled her nose. She absent-mindedly brushed it away, and nervously bit her lip, suddenly aware of the knot forming in her stomach.

She sighed. Maybe this was stupid, she thought. Who was she kidding? Men like him didn't go for women like her. Not for anything serious anyway. Maybe he didn't even read her note. Or maybe he did, but one look at who it was from, immediately prompted him to throw it in the bin! After all, there was nothing between them. An attraction, yes definitely. But nothing solid.

As her mind continued wildly going over all the possibilities, she pulled up her sleeve slightly and looked at her watch. 9.35am.
"How long am I going to sit here like a spooky loner," she said out loud, then quickly checked around to make sure no one was in hearing distance.
Great, now you're talking to yourself, she thought. Yep, you're a great catch!

She giggled despite herself, and shivered. At least it dissolved some of her tension.

Out of the corner of her eye, she could just make out someone walking towards her on the path, but she was almost too scared to look. With her heart pounding in her chest, she brushed some imaginary dust off the sleeve of her jacket and glanced in their direction.

Is it him? It could be. But they're wearing a hat, and she's never seen him in a hat before.

As he got closer, the familiar swagger made her catch her breath. Oh my God! It is him!

They smiled at each other as he got closer still, taking his hat in his hands and shading his eyes in the sunlight.

He quietly sat down beside her, neither of them sure of what to do or say next.
She couldn't remember the last time she'd felt this happy.

"You came" she said, barely louder than a whisper.

"Yes," he said. "I did."

She looked at the view across the park, with a smile on her face and the slightest glimmer of a tear in her eye.

This was going to be a great day.






Linking in with A Mum In The Wild for Short Tale Tuesday








17 comments:

  1. I actually had to take a breath after reading this. I didn't realise I was holding it. I'm so glad it worked out for her. It was a wonderful story that built slowly with a very satisfying ending and it was a pleasure to read.

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    1. Wow, thanks Penny!
      This is the first bit of fiction I've written since high school (I think), so I was a bit worried it was really bad! lol
      Thanks for the confidence boost :)

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  2. Wonderful Tracey, beautifully written, I felt like I was on that bench too x

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    1. Thanks Catherine....glad you enjoyed it! xx

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  3. Awesome Trace!....I was reading away thinking is this a piece taken from one of your fav books?....keep going what happens....Wx

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  4. What a beautifully written piece... so descriptive and beautifully built up. While I'm tempted to ask if you'll continue the tale, I do think it sits nicely as a short story too.

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    1. Thanks Misha! I hadn't considered continuing it, but maybe I should think about it! lol
      Maybe if I can't think of any new stories..... :)

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  5. Oh wow, what a beautiful tale this was. Had me holding me breath too!
    Thanks for sharing this with us. I'm no good at fiction and have so much respect for those who have a talent for it.
    Ronnie xo

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    1. Thank you Ronnie! Glad you enjoyed it :)

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  6. Gorgeous story, Tracey! And what a lovely ending...yet you've left it open for so much more to happen. Hope there's going to be a sequel :)

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  7. We'll see Grace, we'll see! :)
    Thank you
    xo

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  8. Great piece of writing. Do you normally write fiction, because you really should!

    Visiting from FYBF

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    1. Thanks Jess!
      I haven't actually written anything fictional since high school, and I was a bit worried how I would go! Glad it turned out ok!
      Thanks for the visit :)

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  9. Beautiful words. I can't believe you haven't written fiction since high school! I used to love writing in high school too, but can't imagine pulling something like this out of my hat.

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  10. Thank you Kylie!
    I have to say, I'm quite blown away by how much everyone has liked it! I wasn't expecting that at all!
    Now I'm just hoping my next attempt isn't a complete disappointment :)

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Thank you for taking the time to leave a comment!
I love to read them all!

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